I Hate This Job
by finalfantasygirl16
Summary: Kill me now. This job sucks.


AN: I was at Home Depot a few weeks ago and well this was born.

Summary: Kill me now. This job sucks.

I Hate This Job

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxX

"Excuse me sir, what color is this?"

"Blue"

"No, it has a different shade"

"Lady, it's blue"

"What shade of blue?"

"The shade you're about to turn if you don't hurry the hell up and choose" he heavily sighed, elbow firmly placed on the counter as he leaned and rested his cheek on the palm of his hand.

"Hmph! How rude!" the older woman glared at the teen and stormed out the store without purchasing a single thing.

The teen yawned, a tiny tear drop forming on the edge of his eye as he reluctantly straighten up, readjusting himself on his wooden stool and wiped the tear away with the back of his red apron. He was glad that the old hag left the store without further questions or else he would have seriously choked her.

The day was slow and seemed to drag on and on. He just wanted to be anywhere but his crappy job but really what choices did he have when you live on a small tropical island? It was either this, a job at a supermarket/hardware store or flipping burgers and smelling like bacon grease every single day.

Destiny Island wasn't exactly someone's first choice for vacation. There was literally nothing to do on this small island other than pick between the five stores in town, gossip to one another, play cat and mouse with the cops, become public enemy number one which he was pretty sure he already snagged that title for himself long ago. Oh and of course, he couldn't forget about the small island that was a short boat ride away.

He wouldn't blame tourist if they wanted nothing to do with them. There were plenty of other exciting places to go visit like Twilight Town with its long sunsets or even Radiant Garden with their bustling everything.

He was bored out of his mind but it was summer and he needed the money.

Summer jobs are the worst.

Staring at the wooden panels of the ceiling fan as it slowly rotated, creating little to no breeze in the hot store. His golden eyes followed the motion of the fan as he nearly hypnotized himself out of boredom when he heard a crash, something spill over, and one of his dorky co-worker running up to him.

"Vanitas, there's a spill on aisle three!"

"What the hell do I look like? A custodian?"

The co-worker heavily sighed, grumbled, and left Vanitas alone as the seventeen year old continued staring off into space until he saw the small pack of cigarettes sitting on top of his counter.

From the brand alone he didn't have to look at the customer, already knowing that it was his annoying cousin. "What are you doing here?" Vanitas groaned.

"What does it look like? Buying a pack, duh" the blond replied, as he annoyingly popped his lips every time he took out his red cherry lollipop out of his mouth knowing all too well that Vanitas hated that popping noise.

"Telling you about my job was a bad idea" Vanitas rolled his eyes as he scanned the item.

"Hey, if anything, I'm contributing to help you out" he gave Vanitas a wide smile as he took out his wallet, "By the end of summer, you'll be thanking the one and only, the magnificent and dazzling, the ever so charming-"

Vanitas leaned over the counter and shoved the pack of cigarettes against his 'customer's' lips, "Ven, shut up. Go home"

Ven bit the box of cigarettes and placed the cash on the counter top. Taking the box out of his mouth, he made his way out chuckling, "Don't forget my mom's making Xion's favorite casserole tonight so come by the house and you better save my mom the coupons you get here"

"This job sucks just as much as you!" Vanitas yelled as Ven laughed, waving and leaving.

"This is for my girl. This is for her, not me. Just one more month. Just one more month" Vanitas chanted to himself as he went back to sitting on his stool. Customers came and went which helped to distract him for at least an hour and a half. After the lunch rush, the store died down again until Axel, one of his friends came in and purchased a stack of plywood, painter's tape, chains, a rope, and two cans of red and black paint.

"Finally got around to building your kinky sex chamber now, Axel?" Vanitas smirked as he readied himself to scan and input the codes for each item onto the computer.

"Suck it" Axel stuck out his tongue, red tongue ring shining as he grinned, "What if I were? You'd probably never let me use it because you'd be too busy having your wicked way with Xion"

"My shift ends at 8pm, I don't need you giving me any ideas" Vanitas chuckled.

"Me and Roxas, we're building a dog house" Axel gave him the thumbs up and winked, "It's our first diy project so we're pretty pumped. Got it memorized?"

"Pumped. Right" Vanitas had to laugh at that.

Axel rolled his eyes, "Pervert"

Taking his receipt, he made his way out, leaving Vanitas all alone again. With no one else to distract him or annoy him needing his assistance, he was left no other option but to mess around with the things around him.

Taking a pack of gum from the rack against his computer, he unwrapped a piece and popped it into his mouth. Next he took a box of number two pencils and a bag of jellybeans and started to flick them at incoming customers. When that started to become boring and repetitive, Vanitas went on and used the intercom system to annoy the others around him, from requesting random things to acting possessed and demonic to pretending that an alien took over his body – he continued with that for a good thirty minutes.

The only perks about having this job – they were heavily understaffed and couldn't afford to fire him. Besides, he already planned the way he was going to quit, he couldn't let that goal escape him now. He started working there in May and it was nearing the end of summer soon, stuck in the middle of July.

"Come on, August" Vanitas chanted as he took a magazine, black sharpie, and his headphones when he heard what sounded like dying cats on the radio. He wasn't dealing with their crappy music as he enjoyed himself with drawing glasses, giving celebrities monocles and top hats, missing teeth, unibrows, and the pregnant woman on the ads a belly full of creatures sprouting out. Finishing with the first magazine, he moved onto a girl's teen magazine and repeated the process.

Humming to himself to pass the time as he terrorized his work space, Vanitas failed to hear the ding coming from the entrance door welcoming a new customer in. He had his eyes closed as he slowly swayed his head to the loud distorted screams, long guitar, and drum solos coming from his headphones as he shook his leg to keep it from falling asleep on the uncomfortable hard wooden stool.

Feeling small cold hands covering his eyes, Vanitas smirked as he gently took the feminine hands and placed a kiss on them as he opened his eyes and turned around to see his girlfriend. "Hey, what are you doing here, midget?"

She lightly smacked his arm, "It's Xion, not midget. Stupid" Xion stuck her tongue out at him as he quickly took a hold of her and placed her in a headlock as he ruffled her short black hair.

"Vani!" she giggled as he let her go once she was sporting bed hair.

Straightening and running her fingers through her hair, she sighed shaking her head at him. "I came to see if you were busy working, that, and I'm bored"

"Join the club" Vanitas chuckled and took a pad of sticky notes.

"What are you doing?"

"Writing fake black magic/voodoo curses, zombie germs, ghost blood, infectious diseases, and bio hazard warnings to place on random items"

"Why?"

Vanitas smirked, "Why not?"

"How are you not unemployed?" Xion asked herself more than him out loud.

"I need the money" Vanitas shrugged, "Beats flipping burgers for a living. I'd do a lot worse in fast food"

"You still won't tell me what the money's for and I'm-" Xion began when Vanitas suddenly pulled her in closer to him and placed a kiss on her forehead, "I already told you, no matter how much you bug me about it, I won't tell you my main reason for getting this lame ass job" he sternly told her.

"I love you, you know, but sometimes you drive me crazy" Xion sighed.

Vanitas leaned in and kissed her cheek, "Touché. You're a real pain in my ass too, babe."

Taking a step back, Xion gave Vanitas space so he could stand up. Yawing and stretching his muscles, Vanitas took her hand and led her to the cart area.

Before he could explain what they were about to do, another co-worker ran up to him but this time it was a ditzy blonde with watermelons for breasts. She had a bad habit of flirting with the male co-workers and for some reason, she was particularly fond of Vanitas.

"Vani~tas, can you be a sweetie and help me with my computer? I think it froze" she frowned and puckered her lips like a duck. "I'm sure your little sister won't mind" she smirked as she winked at him, waving her hand and signaling him over to her.

Vanitas gritted his teeth, gripping Xion's hand tighter, he let it go and heavily sighed, "I'm not tech support and this is _my _girlfriend"

Without saying a word, Vanitas easily lifted Xion and placed her inside a cart. Driving the cart away with Xion inside, they left the ditzy employee fuming and made their way to the back of the store. "Vani, I'm not five. Why am I inside the cart?" Xion complained.

Vanitas crossed his arms and leaned against the plastic handle of the cart. "Just let me enjoy this" he genuinely smiled at her. Xion smiled brighter than a shooting star, loving it whenever he would act sweet. "Fine" she stuck her tongue at him.

Taking her through the aisles of the store, they stayed mainly around the toy section as Vanitas dumped a container of bouncy balls into the cart. "Vani, what's that evil little head of yours thinking now?"

Vanitas grinned wickedly, "We're gonna have a bit of fun with my friends"

"Vani, you don't have any friends here"

"Exactly"

Running through the aisle at full speed, Xion squealed and grabbed onto the sides of the cart for dear life as they zoomed through. Sneakily finding employees placing price tags on things or restocking shelves up again, Vanitas threw balls at anyone he could find with Xion as his personal assistant. She wasn't particularly against creating havoc especially when it came to Vanitas and his crazy sparks of insanity, as long as there were no major violence involved or seriously injured people in the end – she was all for helping him out, besides it was fun.

Little by little all the bouncy balls in the cart slowly grew smaller in size and eventually they were all gone. Vanitas helped Xion out of the shopping cart as he lifted her up and carried her to the back in the employee's only section. "Vani, what are we doing now?"

"Putting expired dates on all the food. I just need to reload the gun with the price tag stickers"

"So why are you carrying me to the meat locker?"

Vanitas smirked, "I didn't say we would get started now"

"Making out in a cold container filled with preserved meats, how romantic" Xion playfully rolled her eyes and pretended to swoon.

Vanitas had to put Xion down as he scanned his employee i.d. and pressed a few buttons on the pad as it opened. Entering the cold room, the door automatically locked behind them. "Okay, we only have fifteen minutes" he told her as Xion shivered and could visibly see her own breath.

Crossing her arms, she stuck her tongue out, "And who says that I want to kiss you?"

"I could really use my precious pain in the ass girlfriend's touch right about now to get me by my last couple of hours of my hellish shift" Vanitas attempted to look seductive but failed making her laugh instead. "Boy, you really know the way to a girl's heart, don't you?" she giggled as he quickly pulled her closer to him and crashed his lips against hers causing her to moan as she stumbled back against the cold wall for support. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he deepened the kiss.

Fifteen minutes later, they got out of the cold freezer and went looking for the price tag guns. Xion was shivering as she held his hand. Vanitas stopped what he was doing and turned to look at her, taking her hands into his, he gently blew into her hands trying to warm them up again. "Thanks, Vani" Xion smiled as Vanitas leaned in and kissed the top of her head.

Stepping out of the back room, ready to go place expired tags on food, they were stopped once again by another co-worker. "Vanitas, there's bouncy balls everywhere! I need you to go help the others out! Clean this mess up immediately!" the overly panicked man yelled.

Vanitas looked at him with an uncaring expression, "Not my problem" he simply told him and made his way with Xion and the guns.

The co-worker nearly pulled out his own hair out of frustration with how difficult of an employee Vanitas could be ninety-five percent of the time. Stomping, he stormed off to find another person to help him out.

"I'll take aisle five and you take aisle eight" Vanitas instructed.

"Why eight?"

"Five is bread and eight is things in jars"

"Oooh, that's a good one" Xion smirked, a gleam in her eyes as she took the gun that he handed her and quickly walked off.

Vanitas chuckled, "That's my girl"

An hour later, after putting fake expiration dates on foods, creating a domino spill with the cereal boxes, drawing faces on the fruits, egg cartons, and milk gallons, switching sodas and brands around, tipping over soup cans, and finally putting sauce jars upside down, Vanitas and Xion sat down in aisle nine – cookies and crackers.

Backs against the shelf, they shared a jar of peanut butter, oreos, and chocolate chip cookies. Xion rested her head against Vanitas' shoulder as they enjoyed the silence between them. They could hear the outrage and chaos that they've created but they didn't care. She had a fun time, spending time with her boyfriend when she knew that he had to work but at least she had saved him from his boredom. He could care less about his job but he was so close to his goal that he knew that he'd have to actually work the next day and not drive everyone crazy and suicidal.

"I should get going soon" Xion softly said, sad that she had to go but she didn't want to distract Vanitas any longer and besides they practically did all they could to the store already.

Vanitas held her hand, sighing he nodded, "Yeah, I still have five more hours to go"

Xion gave him a sad smile, she never asked him why he asked for long hours and over time all the time. "Promise me that you'll bring home graham crackers. I really want s'mores"

Vanitas chuckled at that, "Fatass"

Xion curled her hand into a small fist and lightly punched his shoulder, "Jerk"

Getting up from the floor, Xion wiped off any dust that might have stuck onto her as she stretched and yawned. Vanitas stood up as well, picking their things from the ground. "I need to go get started on dinner, what do you feel like having tonight?" Xion asked him, pulling out her cell phone so she wouldn't forget on her walk home.

Vanitas placed their food on the shelf as he snaked his arms around Xion's small waist, whispering in her ear, he smirked and said, "You"

Xion blushed and escaped his embrace, "I-I-I meant food, dummy!"

Vanitas genuinely laughed, bending over and holding the shelf for support, one hand on his knee as he laughed it out of his system and gradually calmed down. "Surprise me" he told her, walking over to her, he leaned down and kissed her cheek. Ruffling her short black hair, he made his way back to the front.

Xion narrowed her eyes at him and pouted her lips. "I am so making liver and onions"

Vanitas wasn't too far away, being able to hear her, he cringed at the mention of liver and onions and stopped walking, turning around he crossed his arms and leaned into Xion when she bumped into him, not paying attention.

"Next time we're playing in the hardware section and I won't hesitate to get a few supplies for when we're home and oh yeah, that definitely means handcuffs" Vanitas told her as he continued, "You make liver and onions and I assure you that I'll keep you up all night. That's a promise"

Xion's blush grew a shade darker, getting super embarrassed when he would talk so publicly of more personal things. Biting her bottom lip, she glared at him, nodding her head and agreed.

Vanitas returned to his station in the front and Xion soon left. The remaining five hours of his shift were filled with the noises of opening and closing the cash register, scanning items, assisting old ladies to their cars, helping single moms with their groceries, bagging items, doing price checks, handling money, and waiting for the manager whenever an item wouldn't scan or the computer would freeze up. Vanitas was like a zombie by the time he was done. Dead tired, he made his way home but not before he made a pit stop to his aunt's house to leave her the coupons that Ven was nagging him about.

Once he left his aunt's place with a casserole that he was pretty sure he wouldn't get to even get a piece from since it was Xion's favorite, he made his way home to her.

Taking his house keys, he inserted the key into the lock, twisting and opening, he made his way inside and closed the door behind him.

"I'm home" he yawned.

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxX

Summer was ending all too soon to the little kids on the island but to Vanitas it meant freedom. He was ecstatic to get out of his crappy job. He knew that he wouldn't find a job as laid back as working at the market and he knew that he wouldn't be able to get away with so many things but he didn't care. He was planning on finding a better job, one that paid more and had a better health insurance plan, not that he needed it but he knew that he'd need it for Xion for sure. She couldn't even leave the house without attracting all kinds of clumsy mishaps.

Not having to work today, Vanitas was able to relax for once, meaning no worries of how much he needed to make in order to have enough money for what he was planning on buying. Touching his jean's pocket, he knew that today would be the day he could finally tell Xion why he was acting secretive with her all summer. With plans of resigning from his lame job in the back of his mind, he pushed it further back as he concentrated on his current plans of today.

He got up early that saturday morning and left Xion sleeping in their bed as he made his way to the store. He was a man on a mission and he was glad that they still had the one item he had his eye on all summer long still shining brightly in its display case.

Purchasing the item, he made sure to make it a special day as he went home and made Xion breakfast in bed. A scent of rose petals and the ocean breeze awaking her, Xion blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted.

The window in their bedroom was opened as the white curtains softly swayed against the cool breeze, the sun reflecting on the ocean waves like thousands of diamonds and the excited chipper of the birds – it was a beautiful day and what made it even more beautiful was the surprise of waking up to red rose petals on the bed covers and Vanitas slowly opened the door with his foot as he brought in a silver bed tray with Xion's favorite blueberry pancakes, bacon, hash brown, and eggs with a tall glass of sparkling crisp apple juice.

Xion smiled and titled her head a bit confused, the only rare occasion when she had breakfast in bed was on her birthday. Other than that, it wasn't something they did regularly, "Vani, what's the special occasion?" she asked him as he gently set the tray on the bed.

He didn't say anything as she carefully studied him, when he got down on one knee and pulled a small black box from his pocket, it slowly registered in her head as she gasped and held her breath in. Quickly smacking her hand against her opened mouth, she stared at him with big blue wide eyes.

"Look, I'm not very good at this so I'm just gonna go ahead and say it. I know that we're still just teenagers and your old man and mom would have a fit if we were to have a shotgun wedding but I'm willing to do just about any crazy and stupid thing for you. We're living together and I know that was hard on your parents so this is a promise ring. A promise that we'll get married the right way with a big ceremony, party, and all that fancy crap. I hate ties but I'll wear one just for you. I'd do anything for you, Xion. You're my best friend and my most honest critic. There's some days where I just want to strangle you but then there's days where you drive me insane because I love you so much. I'm not very good with words or expressing myself and you're the only one that gets me and I sound completely sappy. I know that I'm an idiot and I really don't know what you're supposed to say but I'm asking you to wait. You were nagging me all summer and asking why I got that job at the market and it was all so I could buy you this simple ring. I'll propose the right way in the future if you want me to but for now, will you accept this promise ring? If you're up to sticking around with me for the rest of your life" he shrugged and opened the box, revealing a 10k white gold ring swirled with diamonds and sapphires, parts of the ring had 14k gold.

Xion remembered to breathe and smiled, "Vani, you don't have to propose again. I'll just say yes every time, even before you get a chance to ask" she giggled and continued, "There are days where I want to hit my head against the wall and poison you with laxatives but then there's days like these that make me fall in love with you even more. We'll probably have to wait until we're in college or after we graduate but I'd wait an eternity if it meant that I could marry you. I really don't need a traditional wedding, I'd be fine with just a small dinner and inviting all our friends and having a small party. And hey! I can't help it if I nag you! I was really worried that you got into trouble with the law, ok?"

"Fyi, I'm not a convict" Vanitas stated.

Xion took a piece of bacon and threw it at him, "Keyword: yet. With you, anything's possible and I love that even if it means bailing your ass out of jail at three in the morning"

The bacon strip landed on his chest, taking it, he took a bite out of the crispy pork and stuck his tongue out at her. Metallic black tongue piercing shinning as he gave her a silly face with his nose all scrunched up, "Glad to know that you have my back, my ass and I thank you. So you're really okay with being stuck with me for the rest of your life? That means hogging the blankets, fighting over pillows, and you possibly never getting any sleep when I'm home"

Xion blushed at the double entendre of what he said. "Yes! I'm willing to sacrifice the small things but if you ever make me look like a sad panda on purpose then there will be blood spilled" she declared as she motioned for him to give her the ring.

Chuckling he got up and sat on the bed with her, placing the promise ring on her small thin ring finger. Kissing the top of her hand he kissed the ring liking the view. "Since we're practically engaged, that means whatever's yours is half of mine so I'll be taking these delicious blueberry pancakes that I slaved away to cook for you, thank you very much" he told her as he swiftly took her plate and stood up.

"That's not how it works, you dummy!" Xion yelled as he shoved a forkful of pancake into her mouth forcing her to chew.

"I think I know how marriage works, Stupid" Vanitas pointed at her with the tip of the fork, "Now go take a shower and we'll go out and enjoy this nice day. Later I'm taking you out to a nice dinner and then later later, I'm having my wicked way with you"

"Pwevwert" Xion said with a mouthful of pancakes, rolling her eyes and crossing her arms.

Vanitas walked out of the room with the plate of blueberry pancakes as his laughter faded away into the distance.

Xion slowly moved away the tray and pulled the covers off of her, quickly getting up she slipped on her purple fuzzy slippers, taking a moment to admire her new engagement ring, she smiled for a brief second and then ran out the bedroom. "Jerk! Get back here with my breakfast!"

XxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxX

Done!

So Vanitas was working hard… err… more or less... at a job that he hates with a passion all summer long just so he could earn enough money to buy Xion a promise/engagement ring.

I was originally going to make the ditzy blonde Larxene but let's face it – Larxene isn't a ditzy blonde, if anything, she'd be one terrifying employee! LOL.

Remember to R&R! Plz & Thankies! :]

I don't own Vanitas, Xion, and all other characters used in this fic.

Kingdom Hearts is owned by Square Enix/Disney.

Inspired/influenced by texting friends while shopping at Home Depot and the partial mentions of hardware were based on something I found funny about that ridiculous series 50 Shades of Grey.

I just own this idea/plot/story/whatever you want to call it~ lol :P


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